Mice, Rats and a Big Orange Cat
Admittedly, I have mixed feelings about mice. They are tiny, so non-threatening and kinda cute in a Mickey Mouse way but also they can be a transmitter of diseases like the Bubonic plague when the disease actually came through the fleas feasting off of rodents. However, mice keep to themselves for the most part until the population hits critical mass and they decide to strike out to new territory which they want to share with you.
When we moved to rural Utah in 2018, being a Bostonian I was more concerned about snakes especially rattlers, which according to Mormon pioneer legend in Manti, were abundant. I can happily say I personally have not encountered any rattlers which are more of a problem for mice than for men these days.
My fear of snakes stemmed from the powerful influence of children's literature, particularly Rudyard Kipling's Jungle Stories: Riki Tiki Tavi. The King Cobra was the bane of the garden in India and Nagarina was the remaining matriarch who schemed to rid her garden of the humans who killed Nag, her mate, and threatened her hidden brood. Her plan was to coil around the water bowl and wait for the human's midnight run. That lovely thought would nag me nearly every night as I tiptoed to the bathroom in the dark. Sometimes despite my dismissal of such taunting fears I would switch the light on just to be sure no cobras were lurking in the shadows. Irrational I know but that is the power of literature. (I don't like swimming in the ocean anymore either since the movie Jaws)
Another mouse story from children's books has come to mind often in its similarity to the drama played out in the House of Representatives which is supposed to be The People's House but is more like “Nagarina's House' as Speaker Nancy Pelosi hatches schemes and brood after brood of vipers intent upon destroying the garden of mankind and the flower of Democracy, the United States of America. The story of Two Bad Mice by Beatrix Potter is one of my all time favorites because it has a moral to the story and in the end things are put right. I wish I could see that happening for our much maligned and attacked US of A.
The story is about a doll house whose owners go for a walk and two interlopers, Hunca Munca and Tom Thumb, decide to check out the delicious feast of ham, lobster and pie they see spread on the table. When they try to eat the yummy looking fare they realize the food is made of plaster and in their rage they hurl the fake food and dishes at the wall and on the floor causing a dusty mess downstairs. They went up to the bedroom and ripped the feather pillows open and made a thorough mess. The rightful owner came home and called for the police.
These bad mice remind me of Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer who like the two bad mice are intentionally breaking things and going from bad to worse. This continuous reign of destruction seems to have intimidated the rightful owner, we the people, and Chuck and Nancy plan to do away with the police as well as the capitalists that own the house. They plan to bring in hordes of unruly mice to keep themselves in power indefinitely.
In the Potter version, the mice grow a conscience and clean up the mess and actually pay for damages. Yet, in Congress there seems to be no end to the theft of power and draining the treasury instead of draining the swamp as the People desired. Even their vote was stolen. Where are the rattlesnakes and cobras when you need them?
Even a good mouser like Snagglepuss or Sylvester the Cat would be welcome. Yet in my version a solution is getting ready to pounce in the form of a big orange cat named Donald.
As if this mouse tale weren't disturbing enough a rat by the name of Dr. Fauci has been running the CDC for decades funding nefarious projects aimed at depopulating the planet and enslaving the survivors to Big Pharma which can't resist the billions of dollars to be plundered from their many medical offerings. Drunk with power Dr. Fauci and Big Pharma have invaded the halls of power, bought many politicians and plotted with them to get rid of the big orange cat. Fauci has used his power and our tax dollars to green light the use of our aborted children for experimental purposes such as grafting their scalp hair on the heads of mice.
Planned Parenthood, the largest abortion provider in the world, is making millions on the sale of body parts of aborted babies for such experimentation. Grafting for what purpose? A cure for balding? If this doesn't cross a line what will it take to arouse the ire and disgust of the people? If that doesn't make you want to start throwing things, test tubes and petri dishes around Dr. Fauchenstein's laboratory what will?
A real storybook ending would be the eradication of the evil rats and mice in the People's House and the return of the big orange cat.
Chris Noonan Funnell is a free-lance columnist currently living in the Cleveland area.
Acknowledgement and thanks goes to Pr.Thomas Wise who suggested the solution of the big orange cat named Donald. We had a good laugh and a few days later he graduated to heaven.
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